Friday, January 4, 2013
Self Esteem Road Blocks
And to add to all that Brynlees mom thought I was a slut. Her step dad said I was worthless. I made Brynlee tell me everything her mom and step dad said about me, I don't know why I had her tell me that stuff if I was just hurting myself. My self esteem was quickly dropping.
I began to hate going over to her house and hated being around her mom and step dad. You could tell her step dad hated being around me too, he was rude and acted like a know it all. He is a complete jerk... you wouldn't understand. Her mom acted like she had said nothing rude about me whenever I was around.
I felt like crap. My thighs were too big, my stomach was too big my face was too fat... I seriously felt like this picture below my picture. Absolutely terrible. Feeling bad about yourself is really the worst feeling ever. I know lots of other girls feel the same way, ugghhh it's bad. Low self esteem leads to bulimia and anorexia and those are things you don't want to get.
I am not in 11th grade and since then Brynlee moved across town, we aren't as good of friends as we were when she lived right next to me but I still consider her my best friend. We went through a lot together. My self esteem has hiked back up but I still have my days and thoughts. "You are too fat, go running more." "You don't need to eat this time." "Your stomach is supposed to be flat."